Why I love Facebook

Because my friends write updates like this:

[Name] would like to apologize to Rebecca for the whole throwing-the-towel-wrapped-garter-snake-at-you incident this afternoon. It was not a good panic move on my part. The snake is no longer in my front yard and is somewhere happier than my living room due to your keen eyesight. Thank you and please visit again soon!

As a lifelong fan of Dorothy Parker, I’ve always admired how she could compress into a short story what might take other writers an entire novel to communicate. My snake-throwing friend clearly has a similar gift.

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3 Responses to Why I love Facebook

  1. JP Gal says:

    Checking in by cell phone with our cat-sitter while out of town over the weekend, I thought she said that our cat had brought home “a live rattle snake.” Luckily it was just a live garter snake, which she promptly rehomed behind the shed. If your friend ever wishes to borrow a snake-catching cat (he’s pretty handsome, too), just let me know!

  2. Molly says:

    When I lived in a particularly shitty apartment in Iowa City, we had garter snakes twice. Once I thought my cat was playing with a piece of rope, and it was a snake.

    The second time, I thought I’d stepped on my cat’s tail, and I apologized…to the snake I’d actually stepped on (and not harmed; I was barefoot. Here is where one does not ask how we got either snake out of the house; I’m fairly sure they both survived, but it wasn’t pretty).

    I’m not snake-phobic, but they really don’t belong uninvited in my house.

    Then I lived in a house where we had mice, then one with bats, and now we keep getting starlings. My father told me that I have more interesting animals in the house than most people.

  3. TJ says:

    Molly, you should read The Tarantula in My Purse, by Jean Craighead George. It’s a memoir, written for children, that tells all about the odd and unusual pets/animal guests that George and her family have had. Enjoyable, even for adults!

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