The blog “Feminists with Disabilities” called out my May 2nd column, about the mother who insists that her toddler have vegetables with every meal, pretty harshly. I have certain reservations about that blog overall, and I don’t agree with their analysis of my advice, obviously, but the discussion is fascinating, and the comments are really worth a read. Even if you disagree, there are points being made that are definitely worthy of consideration. Eventually someone did come in and defend my point of view.

(Side note: I was amused that one of the most indignant commenters referred to me as “Miss Demeanor.” I’ve always said if I’d gotten to name the column myself, that’s what I would have preferred!)

A particular dynamic that I find intriguing, and that comes up a lot, is that I will say in my column — either implicitly or explicitly — “X is something controversial that people are passionate and not wholly rational about.” And then I will get a slew of angry letters or comments disagreeing with me, by people who apparently don’t realize that the very nature of their passionate, judgmental, highly personal disagreement validates my point. I get this sometimes over gender-related etiquette (especially the use of “ma’am,” honorifics, “you guys” or any other term to address women), but I don’t think anything brings it out quite as much as food or religion.

Remember the teabag tag wars? Most of these involve Yogi Tea. But last week I got Good Earth‘s Sweet & Spicy Herbal Tea, which I like very much. Their teabag tags have quotes from actual philosophers and whatnot. My most recent was an “English Proverb” that stated, “Use soft words and hard arguments.” Very nice!

As promised, and somewhat less likely, as now delivered, are some follow-up answers from yesterday’s chat.

First of all, I was unable to find any references to Memorial Day parade etiquette in terms of whether or not one should applaud for the military groups. As far as traditional etiquette experts are concerned, apparently, the True Meaning of Memorial Day is that one can now wear white shoes. (Miss Conduct, though conservative as all get-out about flag etiquette and respect for veterans, is far more liberal on this topic.) In the absence of official guidelines, I’d say that Katie’s advice to “Put your hand over your heart to pay tribute to the Veterans” is awfully good. And, as many people mentioned — don’t forget to applaud the person at the end of the parade who’s cleaning up after the horses!

Also, we got to talking about Simon Baron-Cohen and his cousin Sasha, and I mentioned an article that Mr. Improbable had written about the “Awkward Moments Test.” Here it is!

I’ll be chatting today from noon-1pm Eastern time here. Come on by!