Happy Monday! Posting may be slow this week due to many, many Friday deadlines. If you’re a Christmas celebrator, what’s your favorite day of the week for Christmas to be on? I rather like this Saturday Christmas thing, myself.

This past Saturday, I had one of the nicest pre-holiday days a person could have. Went to the Harvard Square Craft Fair in the afternoon, and found exactly what I wanted for the ConductMom. In the evening, Mr. Improbable and I went with some friends on the Somerville Illuminations Tour, a civic activity that felt straight out of “Parks & Recreation.” The tour left from City Hall, where free hot drinks and cookies were provided. Directly over the bank of industrial-sized containers of coffee, hot cider, and hot water for tea or cocoa were the mug shots and identification information for all the sex offenders in the city. This got the evening off on the right start, I felt.

The trolley took us past all the glorious and gaudily decorated homes of Somerville, accompanied by narration from a young guide who informed us of the rich history of Somerville whenever we didn’t have lights to look at. (Apparently, Somerville was originally going to be named Walford after a distinguished general, but the city fathers chose to name it “Somerville” instead, on the grounds that “it sounded better.”) Our fellow passengers were, for the most part, jovially drunk.

I don’t know why, but my favorite part of the tour was when the guide said that a particular part of town had once been a big dairy area, and we all let that sink in for a second and then repeated, slowly and in unison, “Dai … ree … ai … ree …. ah.”

I love being a Jew at Christmas. I don’t have to worry about having the Christmas spirit at all the proper moments, I can just have it when it actually happens. Like when an entire trolleyload of mostly-drunk people is momentarily made one by the miracle of assonance.

Merry dairy area to you and yours. How are holiday joys, woes, chores and delights shaping up for you and yours?

P.S. Yes, I know this post had nothing to do with mondegreens. But I didn’t have the Monday blues, so there it is. Here are some good Christmas mondegreens.

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